Kai

His official name is "Malakai Orien" (Orien is pronounced OR-ryan) . His birth mother had named him that and so to honor her we used it as his middle name.

Here is his birth announcement we sent out to our family and friends. It has some more photos of the cutie pie.

Make a Smilebox photobook

There are so many aspects of Kai's story that I want share. I haven't even had a chance to sit down and type it all out. We are still here in Paradise waiting for ICPC approval. We are staying at my Mom's and enjoying seeing some old friends. It has been really a precious time.

Kai is such a sweet baby. He rarely cries and seems very laid back. He does have his days and nights confused, so I am not getting much sleep. But, I don't mind. He is worth it. The nursing is going well. He is growing so quickly and already getting chubby. Everyone here can't get enough of him. I have to fight off the girls for him just to get my chance to hold him.

I want to confess that I was extremely angry with Kai's birth mother leading up to last Saturday. She had made things really difficult, to say the least. By Saturday morning my nerves were shot. I had hardly slept. I was terrified we would lose Kai, that the adoption would fall apart, or that he would get sick with MRSA. I honestly was pissed. I had very little compassion for the woman. I just wanted my baby.

Saturday around 9am, we received the call that she had signed the papers and we could go pick up Kai. We were THRILLED. That morning seems like such a blur. It was all so surreal. All I could do was praise God. We drove as fast we could to the hospital. We were just so anxious to have him in our arms.

All along we had been told that we could not meet Kai's birth mother. There was a guard in her room the entire time she was in the hospital and no one, but hospital staff was allowed in.

When we arrived to get Kai, we were asked if we wanted to meet her. I was taken aback, and in all honesty did not want to. But, how could we say no. After all, she was giving us the most precious gift. I offered up a little prayer, we got on gowns and masks (policy with MRSA patients) and we went in.

Nothing could of prepared me for what would happen in those few short moments. As I entered the room, Kai's birth mother was holding him up to her face weeping. She looked up at me with tears streaming down her cheeks. And in that moment, my heart was forever changed.

I sat down on the bed with her and put my hand on hers. She continued crying, begging me to love him and care for him. She carefully dressed him in the outfit I had given her while wiping tears from her eyes. And then she lovingly placed him in my arms. My eyes filled with tears. Brian's eyes filled with tears too.

I don't remember what else was said. It is truly a blur. But, I know God gave me words to speak to her. We sat on her bed while I told her how much we loved Kai and how we would always tell him about her love for him. I made many promises, all that I intend to keep. And before I walked out of the room, I told her all about God and how much He loves her and this little boy.

Before I got up to leave, she handed us a letter she had written. It might be the most beautiful thing I have ever read. There is no doubt that she loves Kai and that her plan to give him up was truly out of love. As I left the room I could hear her sobbing. My heart was so broken for her.

As hard it was, I am so thankful God allowed us that time with her. I have asked God daily to forgive me for my rotten attitude towards her. I know he orchestrated all of it, not just for her sake, but for mine. She will always hold a very special place in our hearts.

Thank you to everyone who encouraged me to keep loving Kai's birth mother. You all were so right. And I am grateful for you and your willingness to say some hard things to me. I needed to hear them. And God knew I needed to be prepared for that special meeting.

I have so much more I want to share, but my little man wants to nurse. Next post I want to share with you Kai's miraculous healing. It is an amazing story.