A little about me

June said...
I would love to know how you "manage" your life...Are you a meal planner? How do you shop? What's your typical day like? Do you get "alone" time? Are you organized and structured or laid back? A glimpse of your daily life sounds fun to me! Thanks!!

Hi June -

Great questions. Hopefully, I can answer them.

Am I a meal planner? Sometimes, but mostly no. I really am more spontaneous on most days. I am one of those people who can throw a meal together with just about anything. I am sure life would go much more smoothly if I did plan ahead, but I am being honest here. Certain days like when I know we have soccer or piano, I will plan to make a crock pot dinner in the morning so it is ready for the evening. Chili and soups are staples around here. I am a firm believer in meals being simple, easy to prepare and healthy. It doesn't have to always be complicated. We try and keep certain items in the house , like cans of beans. There are so many things you can make with beans.

The Rockstar does most of the shopping. He is crazy about saving us money. I mean crazy. Check out his other posts on the subject, here and here. Sometimes I make him a list, but more often then not because of the way he shops, I come up with meals with whatever he brings home.

A typical day here is never typical. One thing I love about homeschooling is the freedom to do whatever we want. This year has been a little different though with J-man in school. It limits us a little on being spontaneous. Most days begin around here at 6:30am. J-man catches the bus then. And all of the kids start waking up one by one. The older ones usually have to be dragged out of bed. The Rockstar does breakfast most mornings. I am not a morning person, so I am very appreciative of this. We have done it this way for many years. After breakfast the kids do their chores. They each have a small list of things they have to do before we start the day. I often find though that they need me to remind them every day of what they are supposed to do. I usually take chore time to get a shower. My showers are mostly short and sweet and may or may not consist of little people joining me. After the house is cleaned up, we start school. Sometimes though we don't do traditional school and instead we pack up and hit a park. We explore. We might write down in our journals what we see. Sometimes we go to the library or a children's museum. Sometimes we stay in our PJ's all day and read books.

When I first started home schooling I thought it had to be just like school and that we had to sit at the table for 6 hours every day. I quickly realized how much that was never going to work. And as the years have gone by, I have gotten much more relaxed in how we do school. I firmly believe they need the discipline of having to sit and do workbooks or math problems, but I also firmly believe in letting them explore their world, learn to cook, watch sign language videos, crochet, play piano, catch bugs, read as many books as they can devour, and simply enjoy learning. The bottom line is, I want them to love learning. They do all love computers and I often find them on sites like Free Rice, a very educational site that also helps feed the poor. If your kids like the computer, check it out. They also love this site where they can preform virtual surgery on patients. At first I was a little grossed out by it, but several of my kids are obsessed with it.

Usually around 4pm we do another quick clean up of the house and I start dinner. I almost always have two dinner helpers. My kids love to help in the kitchen. And I see this as time to spend together. It also makes preparation go much quicker. We eat at 6pm when the Rockstar comes home. Baths are at 7. Little people go down at 7:30, the next group at 8pm, and the three oldest at 9-9:30pm. We are pretty strict about bedtime, because the evenings are for us. With a big family, I cannot say this enough, making time for your marriage is imperative. We don't do anything special. We just enjoy being together.

Do I get alone time? Yes. Sometimes it is just 30 minutes in the morning while the Rockstar is doing breakfast. 30 minutes alone with God to prepare for my day. 30 minutes of silence curled in my bed, reading the word, talking to God. Now and again, I get out alone too. Just to look around a book store, or sit in a coffee shop. But, this doesn't happen very often. Because truthfully, I would rather be with my family. Once in a while when I am on overload, the Rockstar will say "Retreat to your cone of silence" . That is when I run a hot bath, put on my favorite music and have an hour alone. My husband is very good about recognizing when I need this. It usually happens about once a month.

Am I organized and structured or laid back? I would say both. With this many children, you do need to be organized and structured in addition to being laid back. I used to be obsessed with keeping my house clean. I gave up on that years ago. I still like it neat, but I have also realized that we need to live in it too. There has to be a balance of staying on top of it, but not getting crazy about it. I often will tell myself ... Courtney, when you come to the end of your life and you are standing before God, He isn't going to say "Well done, your house was always sparkling and looked like something out of Better Homes and Gardens". In fact I say this to myself often about many areas of my life. It keeps me in check and helps me prioritize. I don't want to miss out on the joy of my precious treasures because I was too busy cleaning and organizing. Now that is not to say that I don't clean or organize though. In order for our life to run smoothly, I do feel we need to maintain some level of it.

Many of our best days are the ones where we are spontaneous. Life is too short to spend it rushing around. I limit our activities for this very reason. I want to enjoy mothering. I don't want to always be rushed and stressed. My favorite days are when we do nothing at all, just be together.

I have pretty high expectations for behavior. I expect my children to listen. I expect them to obey and I like them to be orderly. But, with 9 children, this is not always possible. I wouldn't say our home is chaotic. In fact sometimes it is really quiet, but there are times where chaos rules. Little boys tend to amp this up. Mikie and McWilliam are forever wrestling or running through the house. And while you will often hear me say "Indoor behavior!!!" to the two of them over and over and over - I also love this about them. I love being a Mom to boys. In general though, I am strict about how they behave. Are they perfect? No, of course not. No one is, but I expect them to try their best.

I am laid back about stuff. Because the fact is carpets get stained, stuff gets broken. It is just stuff. And it is why we don't buy new. We stick to used things because then we don't mind so much when it gets ruined. Milk spills. Jeans get holes. Shoes get muddy. It happens. You have to roll with it.

Do I lose my cool now and then? YUP. I am not Michelle Duggar. I lose my patience. I yell sometimes .

Gasp.

I am not perfect. I apologize to my children often. And I explain to them that we all fall short, we all fail, and we all lose our cool. I try very hard to stay calm, but I am human. And just like every Mother on earth, I lose it now and then.

I hope I answered some of your questions June. Thank you for letting me share.